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Posts tagged Finance

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$2 Billion? | Charge it to the game J.P.

I play my part in major a non-profit performing arts center and even the peeps around here are whispering about dents in their respective portfolios. 

Little do they know I’m the oddball out with a degree in Applied Economics, not Comparative Literature or Theatrical Performance, so I’m a tad conversant on the subject. And… and this news changes nothing. 

Big banks will still arbitrage markets until the only thing left to exploit is the collateralized fund of street art they purchased from a shady Rio holding company after six rounds of bourbon at a clandestine dining club. And companies whose revenue streams are driven by ancillary components, i.e. Facebook, will continue to revel in their own overvaluation

But I know nothing. I’m penniless. 

«Leafs through tattered copy of Malkiel’s A Random Walk Down Wall Street

Filed under Finance J.P. Morgan Stock Trading Wall Street James Facebook Capital Markets

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The End of Wall Street As They Knew It

Cogent compendium of everything many of us have been consumed with since those fated days in 2008. Alas, the finance sector need not fret, it’ll bounce back. Someone’s going to make bank at least. Just maybe not that disgruntled banker in the ill-fitting Ron Paul suit muttering to himself in the streets about options he underwrote four years ago… Cray cray.

Shouldve taken the job at that unsexy hedge fund in west bubblefoop Pennsylvania. They’re over there winning

Filed under Capital Markets Economy Finance New York Magazine Policy Wall Street James

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I’ve been avoiding this because… I’m a hater or something. 
But… there’s a silver lining that appeals to my beat. 
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Morgan Stanley facilitated Facebook’s initial public offering. This matters, and it does, because my first name is Morgan. I take interest in the transactions and business dealings of Señor Stanley and JP Morgan. My Wall Street namesakes best stay dogged. 
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Some sage Graffiti Artist made bank. He was paid in gum instead of cash for painting the walls of Facebook’s Silicon Valley office with the esthetic wonders of InterventionHall of Famer, Allison’s, second favorite vice. Gum is geek for stock. Stock presently valued at $200 Million. NaCl is geek for salty. That’s me. 
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Some HBIC lady who goes by Sheryl Sandberg is Facebook’s Chief Operating Officer. At inception she owned 1.9 million shares and stands to get 38.1 million more, which would make her one of the few billionaire women in Silicon Valley. 
I would sell.. I would sell, my love, my silver Versa Hatchback, Man-Man, and invest the cash as capital to the first wiz-kid I encounter if in five years his IPO swindle would render me R I C H. The kind of rich that makes one want to name their first child Agamemnon, buy an island chain off the coast of Portugal, and entertain bffl’dom with Sir Richard Branson.
Lookit, the official S-1 SEC filing. Click through some of the utterly irrelevant photos too, if you like. Zuckerberg thought they’d make some analyst happy. A tender offer.
Aside: I named my car Man-Man because he’s a pimp. He’s a hatchback with Cornell Alum plates and a presidential tint. Thugged. 

I’ve been avoiding this because… I’m a hater or something. 

But… there’s a silver lining that appeals to my beat. 

Morgan Stanley facilitated Facebook’s initial public offering. This matters, and it does, because my first name is Morgan. I take interest in the transactions and business dealings of Señor Stanley and JP Morgan. My Wall Street namesakes best stay dogged. 

Some sage Graffiti Artist made bank. He was paid in gum instead of cash for painting the walls of Facebook’s Silicon Valley office with the esthetic wonders of InterventionHall of Famer, Allison’s, second favorite vice. Gum is geek for stock. Stock presently valued at $200 Million. NaCl is geek for salty. That’s me

Some HBIC lady who goes by Sheryl Sandberg is Facebook’s Chief Operating Officer. At inception she owned 1.9 million shares and stands to get 38.1 million more, which would make her one of the few billionaire women in Silicon Valley. 

I would sell.. I would sell, my love, my silver Versa Hatchback, Man-Man, and invest the cash as capital to the first wiz-kid I encounter if in five years his IPO swindle would render me R I C H. The kind of rich that makes one want to name their first child Agamemnon, buy an island chain off the coast of Portugal, and entertain bffl’dom with Sir Richard Branson.

Lookit, the official S-1 SEC filing. Click through some of the utterly irrelevant photos too, if you like. Zuckerberg thought they’d make some analyst happy. A tender offer.

Aside: I named my car Man-Man because he’s a pimp. He’s a hatchback with Cornell Alum plates and a presidential tint. Thugged. 

Filed under Facebook Finance IPO James Silicon Valley News

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Soros seers, as Europe constricts its economy, and as the U.S. sluggishly rehabilitates, the world economy will encounter a nasty bout of deflation; only developing nations to emerge unscathed.

Today credit rating agency Standard & Poors downgraded France’s golden AAA rating to AA+, as the Euro hit a new 16-month low against the dollar of $1.263 as speculation of the multiple down grades (Austria and Italy slated next) circulated. With no sign of auspice, George Soros’ presage Monday could be well underway or the markets are calibrating per years of leniency.  

"It’s not good news, but it’s not a catastrophe,” Mr Baroin said following emergency talks called by President Nicolas Sarkozy with the prime minister and other key ministers. (BBC)

Filed under George Soros Global World Finance Economy Deflation James

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Goldman shorting Greek debt, duh.

Linked article is from February 2010. That darn firm evades risk and maximizes profit like a prescient Soros. Unlike the philosophic financier, Greece’s fiduciary straits keep it reliant on the mercy of the dynamic duo, France’s President Nicolas Sarkozy and the Vaterland’s Margaret Thatcher, German Chancellor Angela Merkel.

In this episode of The Adventures of Tintin, the potentate portmanteau Merkozy, during a summit today in Berlin, threatened to cut off bailout funds for Greece unless the illiquid nation is able to restructure its debt per private sector bond swaps in addition to the prescribed European ( €130 billion) and International Monetary Fund (€165 billion) lending. Failure to secure this second bailout package could lead to a credit default in Athens as early as March (New York Times)

Last night’s second season premiere of Showtime’s Shameless had one of Fiona’s beau de jour’s jokingly defend his profession, casually quipping “Nah that wasn’t me. I was in grad school during the MBS securitizations. Now we’re shorting Greek debt.”

Who isn’t

Filed under Angela Merkel Economy Euro Global Goldman Sachs Greece IMF James Nicolas Sarkozy Shameless Shorting Showtime Finance Wall Street

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VF Corp to acquire Timberland with $2 Billion deal.

Over the past two years I’ve intermittently incorporated my 9th grade Tim’s into my wardrobe on days Home Depot chic whispered my name. My mother hates them. She doesn’t get it. Yet she admits it’s “cool,” but can’t explain why. Pencil skirts and cable knit prep can’t be a gal’s only resource. 

The demarcation of style rests with the classic and the daring ma mère. 

Filed under James Finance Style Fashion